Have you ever sunk inside yourself to a place of darkness so deep you couldn’t see the light? Had no hope? Felt completely alone in a world filled with so many people?
I have. I’ve lived it, breathed it.
Because life hated me.
It disliked me from the moment of conception, despised me when I was born, loathed me when I bounced from each foster home, and kicked me in the gut when I watched the one thing that meant everything to me leave.
For years, I drifted, unable to find my footing, never knowing what the word stable meant. Then a single moment in time rocked me to my core, changing me and making that solid ground I so desperately craved crumble at my feet, causing me to fall farther than I’d ever imagined.
The darkness of the swirling tornado that is depression captured me, pulling me down to its depths, drowning me, suffocating me, owning me.
A depth so deep, I didn’t think I’d survive and didn’t care if I did. I only wanted peace. I wanted the pain to disappear. I wanted to be … free.
Needing to fall into the cyclone of darkness was the only way I could find the light.
**Mature Content. 18+ only.**
Warning! if you suffer from severe depression or PSTD you may not want to read this book.
Its dark, intense, sad and gritty, its very emotional reading and I often found myself with tears running down my face. I would think there are things in this that most people can empathise with in some way, the issues raised are hard to read and even understand how anyone could survive as long without having this type of breakdown. The story does lighten as the characters grow and interact together, as they start making a life with some fun in it. Despite the warning this is a great book, its one of struggle, pain, finding trust and love, but most of all life and light. these issues are on going, they do not go away you find ways to deal and live with them. Ways to manage so they don't rule your life but become a more minor part of that life. I loved it, it held me in its grip and I did'nt want to put it down I needed to know the outcome. Ryan Michelle has a fantastic grasp of words and how to use them, I have enjoyed every one of her books but this I feel is her strongest, most personal and the one to put her at the top of the game.
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